I Get It. So, Enough.

Your attractive. Your loveable. Your athletic. Everyone likes you. You have a close friend. I get it. I'm not like you alright. Too bad your older sibling's a freak. The acne scar on my face. Pimples coming one after another. I don't have a close friend to be with. I'm not like you.

When I tell you a story about things happening in my school, it means I have a safe spot to open to. I told you there's someone in my school that likes me. You laughed. I should've tough it out but it stings. You said that the person who liked me has no type. I get it. A lot of people has a crush on you. You keep repeating again and again saying how could someone even like me.I hate feeling weak. I just don't. Your god's favourite I get it.

I keep trying to hide my smile because how ugly I look. My face is chubby. Everyone says that. Some say it's cute but I know it's all a lie. I thought you were the only one I could vent to. But I thought wrong. You think your better than everyone(From my perspective).
Too bad you have an ugly older sibling huh? I'm done with this. 

I'm not mad at god on how he decides my fate and I know all of this is just a test. Thanks for still giving me chances to live on this earth, god.


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Read and ponder. Ponder and think. Think and make a decision. Make a decision and take action.

There you go again. Going around and saying, "Fate hasn't been kind to me." "My face is so unsymmetrical." "I hate her. She's a snake." "I wish I was smart." Have you realized that all of the things you said is not fixed?  "Why did it have to turn out like this?" Maybe you did something wrong. Try again. A big step CAN causes a big failure, but that doesn't mean you should stop trying all together right? "I'm so ugly. My nose is crooked, my lips are thin, I have a monolid-" and so on. All of the things that you're saying is fixed by god. He created you. He is the one who decided what features you would have. What if he saw his own masterpiece, you, hating on them self saying how ugly they are. Remember, the verse 82:6-8 “[It is] He who created you, fashioned you, and balanced you; in whatever form He willed has He assembled you.” In is indeed from the Qur'an but surely positive things can be accepted by...
Read more

Been a while no?

To my non existent readers, it's been a while since I upload. Not because I have anything but because I'm lazy to. It's just nothing unique has happened in my life, and now I'm back with a topic worth talking about. Today, I'm going to confess my pent up feelings that I've been holding back. Well, technically I did tell my friends but not too detailed about it and only to my close friend. And if you still didn't catch on for today's topic, it's about my crush. He has a curly hair. But in a way that is not too curly but is considered curly. He's what most people call short but if me and him would stand side by side, we're practically the same height. I liked him for his looks and he just happens to be cute when he smile. The first encounter that I had with him was when I was walking down the hallway with my friends after school ends, and there I saw him walking alone, the strap of his bag hovered one of his shoulder, he had an unpleasant expre...
Read more

Second day of the mid-year exam

Uh. I didn't tell you about this yet right, fellas? Faron didn't came. Well not exactly, he came but he had a competition elsewhere so he didn't do the exam.  At first, I saw him in the morning when I was sitting at the canteen. He was wearing a maroon Baju melayu. Yeah, when I saw that I already know that he have something to attend. I actually don't know whether to feel happy, mad, or sad. He just didn't came. How should I even react to that? But I know for sure that I'm a tad disappointed about it. After every exam, I usually look over to him to see how's he doing with the test. Always finish early, with his unbothered face answering the questions. I WISH I was like that. Let's stop this one-sided rivalry once again and talk about my day. I had ; MATH EXAM; hm. I was actually confident at first but I MADE DUMB MISTAKES ALL OVER THE TEST. I FKING HATE MYSLEF FOR THATTT. Listen, 17², how much do you think that would be? A normal, knowledgeable person wo...
Read more